We live in unprecedented times…where it’s actually permissible and possible for couples and singles to ask themselves and each other “baby?”
With the birth rate in North America at an all time low, our species is sailing into uncharted waters. It’s especially easy to get blown off course if one partner nods up and down and the other back and forth. Or the ambivalence of either party stretches on year after year and then (OMG, how did that happen?!) she’s turning 35. Sometimes couples arrive at different answers and the work is to determine whether to willing sacrifice the longing to be a parent in order to embrace remaining a couple. Or to wind down the relationship as tenderly and honourably as possible, supporting both individuals in moving along their own new path.
Even if both parties are very clear that they ARE dumping the baby with the bath water, it’s not always an easy sell to wannabe grandparents or uncles or aunts. And how do you gently point out that far from being selfish, the choice to not bear a child reduces the footprint on the planet more than any other act one could make? Or respond to other unsolicited words of wisdom …..what does it take to get real sustainable clarity on this crucial life-altering decision?
Sometimes a couple wants to work through some of their own Family of Origin “issues” before junior arrives so s/he doesn’t have to carry that family transmission of unresolved trauma. Or they want to learn about their own attachment and lean deeper into earning secure bonds in order to gift their baby with attunement and presence.
Regardless of their varying goals and dynamics, Sara has brought dozens of couples and singles through the many complex twists and turns of this question, and can be counted on to bring sensitivity, clarity and compassion to your exploration.